Posted by
Blanca DeBree on Wednesday, October 17, 2007 2:50:48 PM
I recently took a trip, and was thumbing my way through the
SkyMall catalog
they place on board every aircraft in the known universe. Now normally
I don't pay any attention to any of the crap they sell. I really don't
need an authentic reproduction of the wands Harry Potter and Hermanie
used. I also really don't need a geniune fascimile of the Lord of the
Rings ring. And who in their right mind needs a real replica of the
light sabers Anakin Skywalker and Master Yoda used? As I was dozing off
from the third vodka tonic, something suddenly caught my eye.
Right there on page 191 was the
personalized branding iron
(PBI) I have seen year after year. This rather kitch piece of crap lets
you personalize your steaks by branding them with your initials.
Nothing says "keep your grubby paws off" like branding. I was thinking
of branding all of my lunches when I put them in the Fox News
refrigerator. That jackass Sean Hannity keeps stealing mine. Now I love
Sean to death, but he's a real klepto. Whenever he asks "what about the
buses," what he's really doing is making a subconscious confession
about the time he stole a Greyhound bus and took fifty of his closest
friends south of the border for some tequila, cocaine, and underage
whores. But I digress.
I noticed the initials on the PBI had
changed. No longer did they proudly display GWB, an obvious homage to
our Commander Guy. No, now they were simply CZS, which could stand for
some Czech or perhaps some secret code for where all the dead hookers,
which Sean Hannity has murdered over the years, are buried. But
whatever they are, they no longer stand as a burned-in-cow-flesh beacon
to our greatest President ever.
Shame on you "
The Greatest Gift!"
You abandoned our Decider in his hour of need. You should be ashamed of
yourselves! Let's just say I wouldn't make any incriminating phone
calls from now on. The Master is listening!